Everything over to Tumblr. It better suits my ADD thought process.
http://kellypaton.tumblr.com
Monday, July 26, 2010
Monday, December 14, 2009
Twitter Trending Topics: God Help Us All
I feel like it's been too long since I spent an inordinate amount of time over analyzing something. So here we go: Twitter trending topics. Now, for those of you who "tweeting" and find yourself wondering what the heck a trending topic is, just leave. Now. If you're not on Twitter or haven't at least ventured over there to check it out, in all seriousness, I'm not sure how you're surviving in the world today. Do you still have a Zack Morris phone? Are you Amish?
I'll admit, the trending topics have been a source of lots of breaking news for yours truly. There are lots of important things that I might not have known about for a while without them. Like Michael Jackson's heart attack... thing. And something about one of the Jonas Brothers getting engaged. Oh, and that time that the full length trailer for New Moon was leaked on YouTube. You know, all the really important stuff.
Now, when there is a seeming lack of important news out there for the twittering population to get all tweet-crazy about, there is a lot of #uselesscrap that shows up. I mean, really? #Somethingaintright was a top trend the other night. What does this even mean? Why, people, are you continuing to keep this at the top by posting such gems as "If u can afford gucci and LV.. but can't afford to get the extra 9 sets of teeth out of ur mouth #somethingaintright." Wow, thanks, @itsjessybaby. You've clearly made a point. Zing.
Other trending topics that make me wonder about the future of our society:
#OMGFacts
#willgetyouslapped
#eggplant
#whatchutalkinboutwillis
#3drunkwords
#ohnoyoudidnt#pedamundo
#playedout
Now, I made a couple of those up. Sad part? You have NO way of telling which ones aren't real. On average there are 1.9 million tweets per day. To become a trending topic, I found something online that says a topic must be tweeted about 1200 times in an hour. That means that 1200 people were tweeting about #eggplant in the same hour for some unknown reason.
Like I said... God help us all
I'll admit, the trending topics have been a source of lots of breaking news for yours truly. There are lots of important things that I might not have known about for a while without them. Like Michael Jackson's heart attack... thing. And something about one of the Jonas Brothers getting engaged. Oh, and that time that the full length trailer for New Moon was leaked on YouTube. You know, all the really important stuff.
Now, when there is a seeming lack of important news out there for the twittering population to get all tweet-crazy about, there is a lot of #uselesscrap that shows up. I mean, really? #Somethingaintright was a top trend the other night. What does this even mean? Why, people, are you continuing to keep this at the top by posting such gems as "If u can afford gucci and LV.. but can't afford to get the extra 9 sets of teeth out of ur mouth #somethingaintright." Wow, thanks, @itsjessybaby. You've clearly made a point. Zing.
Other trending topics that make me wonder about the future of our society:
#OMGFacts
#willgetyouslapped
#eggplant
#whatchutalkinboutwillis
#3drunkwords
#ohnoyoudidnt#pedamundo
#playedout
Now, I made a couple of those up. Sad part? You have NO way of telling which ones aren't real. On average there are 1.9 million tweets per day. To become a trending topic, I found something online that says a topic must be tweeted about 1200 times in an hour. That means that 1200 people were tweeting about #eggplant in the same hour for some unknown reason.
Like I said... God help us all
Friday, November 13, 2009
Frog Fever
I'm coming out of a near two-month blog hiatus (slump?) to write about a topic that has been all encompassing in my world lately: TCU Football Fever. Ok, maybe by lately I mean more like this week.
I'll be the first to admit that when I was in college I spent more time in the parking lot drinking beer during football games than I actually spent in the stadium watching the games. And I'm OK with that.
SIDE NOTE: I'm at a coffee shop/bar (genius business model) in the Vail area watching my boyfriend, Kevin, play a solo acoustic show right now. He's playing a really awesome show. You should be here right now, seriously. In addition to listening him rip it up on stage, I'm multitasking by blogging while also observing the behavior of a cougar who just showed up. I think she's on a date with this guy she came in with, but she's paying no attention to him. She's too busy making friends with all the young meat in the place. It's classic. I think she only brought the older guy with her so he would sponsor her tab for the night while she hunts.
Am I bad girlfriend for blogging and people watching during Kevin's set instead of paying attention? Probably. Moving on...
Back to the point: TCU is kicking ass and taking names this year. And apparently they have a huge game tomorrow. A big enough game that even I, a fair weather football watcher at best, almost bought a plane ticket today to go to Fort Worth for the game tomorrow. Luckily my better judgement slapped me upside the head and made me re-evaluate my priorities.
Does anyone outside of my friends from Texas, and obviously my fellow TCU attendees, know what our mascot is? The Horned Frog. Please see it here. Most people might know it as the horned toad or a horned lizard. Whatever. Do you know what matter? It's defense mechanism. What might that be you ask?
It shoots BLOOD OUT OF ITS EYES. Up TO FIVE FEET AWAY. Wikipedia confirms it here. Don't argue; Wikipedia is always right. How intimidating is that? Don't mess with anything that shoots blood out of its eyes. That's just good sense.
This is why TCU will win tomorrow. My logic is foolproof.
Rah, Rah TCU!
(This cougar is ridiculous. I'll be entertained all night.)
I'll be the first to admit that when I was in college I spent more time in the parking lot drinking beer during football games than I actually spent in the stadium watching the games. And I'm OK with that.
SIDE NOTE: I'm at a coffee shop/bar (genius business model) in the Vail area watching my boyfriend, Kevin, play a solo acoustic show right now. He's playing a really awesome show. You should be here right now, seriously. In addition to listening him rip it up on stage, I'm multitasking by blogging while also observing the behavior of a cougar who just showed up. I think she's on a date with this guy she came in with, but she's paying no attention to him. She's too busy making friends with all the young meat in the place. It's classic. I think she only brought the older guy with her so he would sponsor her tab for the night while she hunts.
Am I bad girlfriend for blogging and people watching during Kevin's set instead of paying attention? Probably. Moving on...
Back to the point: TCU is kicking ass and taking names this year. And apparently they have a huge game tomorrow. A big enough game that even I, a fair weather football watcher at best, almost bought a plane ticket today to go to Fort Worth for the game tomorrow. Luckily my better judgement slapped me upside the head and made me re-evaluate my priorities.
Does anyone outside of my friends from Texas, and obviously my fellow TCU attendees, know what our mascot is? The Horned Frog. Please see it here. Most people might know it as the horned toad or a horned lizard. Whatever. Do you know what matter? It's defense mechanism. What might that be you ask?
It shoots BLOOD OUT OF ITS EYES. Up TO FIVE FEET AWAY. Wikipedia confirms it here. Don't argue; Wikipedia is always right. How intimidating is that? Don't mess with anything that shoots blood out of its eyes. That's just good sense.
This is why TCU will win tomorrow. My logic is foolproof.
Rah, Rah TCU!
(This cougar is ridiculous. I'll be entertained all night.)
Thursday, September 10, 2009
Little kids are cool.
You know what I think is the coolest thing about being kid under the age of 10? You can get away with behavior for which anyone over the age of 10 might be reprimanded and/or considered borderline insane. I have a little sister who is seven. Almost eight. Her name is Hannah and she's the bomb. Yes, the bomb. I know, the term is outdated but she is just that cool. And you might have gotten caught up on the part about how I have a little sister that's seven. I could go into the whole story about how, yes, she's seven and I'm 24 and yes, my brother is 26 and my other sister is 18 blah, blah, blah. It's a big family and we're just a wee bit spread out age wise. If you're super duper concerned, I'll let you take it up with my mom and dad. Let's stick with the point: Hannah is hilarious. Here's a smattering of things she does that I find amusing. I imagine these types of behaviors still hold true for the majority of child kind.
1) Inappropriate commentary: She can say things that are socially inappropriate because she probably heard it on TV and doesn't know any better. She probably actually knows exactly what she's saying, but it's funny to hear these silly things come out of such a small person. So we let it fly.
2) Rolling in the dirt: No. Seriously. I watched her do this last weekend. She was bored. So she just flopped down in the dirt.
3) Running through sprinklers/fountains: That looks SO effing fun. I want to push all those little kids out of the way and run through the water. I bet it's refreshing.
4) Leaving long winded phone messages that make almost no sense: Wait, I still do that.
5) Refusing to wear an article of clothing or color simply because you just don't want to: Hannah went through a 5 year phase where she would not wear anything girly. No pink. No dresses. No ribbons. For Halloween, she would only go as superheroes like Spiderman and Superman. Nobody asked questions.
I wish I could apply these principles to my life now. Refusal to do things because, you know what, I just don't wanna. Pay rent this month? No thanks. Have a roll in the dirt followed by a run through the sprinklers? Yes, please.
1) Inappropriate commentary: She can say things that are socially inappropriate because she probably heard it on TV and doesn't know any better. She probably actually knows exactly what she's saying, but it's funny to hear these silly things come out of such a small person. So we let it fly.
2) Rolling in the dirt: No. Seriously. I watched her do this last weekend. She was bored. So she just flopped down in the dirt.
3) Running through sprinklers/fountains: That looks SO effing fun. I want to push all those little kids out of the way and run through the water. I bet it's refreshing.
4) Leaving long winded phone messages that make almost no sense: Wait, I still do that.
5) Refusing to wear an article of clothing or color simply because you just don't want to: Hannah went through a 5 year phase where she would not wear anything girly. No pink. No dresses. No ribbons. For Halloween, she would only go as superheroes like Spiderman and Superman. Nobody asked questions.
I wish I could apply these principles to my life now. Refusal to do things because, you know what, I just don't wanna. Pay rent this month? No thanks. Have a roll in the dirt followed by a run through the sprinklers? Yes, please.
Sunday, September 6, 2009
What Just Happened Here?
Sometimes I do something and then, in retrospect, I wonder why in the hell I did it. For example, I just spent the last hour cleaning my computer. No, not like cleaning off the hard drive of meaningless files that I no longer need. Cleaning the hard drive would be pointless. It's only 60 GB and that 60 GB breaks down into: 50 GB music, 5 GB operating system, 5 GB leeway for downloading more music. My plan is fool proof.
Side bar - When I ordered my dreamy iBook G4 circa February 2005 and I upgraded the hard drive space to 60 GB my brother quite vehemently assured me there was no way humanly possible that I would EVER necessitate such an impossibly gigantic hard drive. Moving on.
The day progressed thusly: I woke up to the gigantic mess that is my apartment, as I have yet to clean it. I hate cleaning. I am procrastinating the cleaning. It's kind of gross outside and I'm feeling a little sick. I can't do outdoorsy mountain things so I will do something geeky. I will download some new music. Let's see how full I can pack this computer.
Now, I've had this fine machine for a number of years and I love it. I have been an Apple nerd since before it was cool and hip to be an Apple nerd. I realize it's pretentious to say that and no one will probably believe me, but you can ask my parents. I annoyed the hell out of them for a Mac long before I was lucky enough to get one. I had to accidentally (oops) kill my PC laptop to get this one. It's been a good companion. We've been through a lot together. It's only had to go to the repair shop once because someone accidentally threw a full drink on it in the dorms. That person very nearly lost his life. He's lucky he's a very large man and that I'm a relatively small and weak girl. Relatively.
Anyway, after many years of use, the white case iBooks get, well, a little gnarly. Like, really gnarly. I tried to help by covering mine in sweet stickers which shows that I am an independent thinker and that I like really sweet bands while simultaneously hiding the really big scratches on the lid. There is very little you can do, however, about the gnar level of the keyboard. It gets gross. Just gross. Which I have usually been able to keep under tabs in the past with a low-level use of elbow grease.
It seems, though, that conditions here in the mountains have made for a far nastier computer dirtiness level than anywhere else I've had this thing. It's never been like this. I think the dirt is part cement. It might cause cancer. Or cure it. That would be my luck, now that it's all cleaned off my keyboard. Anyway, I started with my usual method, the iKlear Apple Polish product. Didn't touch whatever kind of mutant dirt was all over the keys. I tried Windex on cotton swabs. Nothing.
So then I moved on to rubbing alcohol. What just happened to the last hour of my life? Seriously. An hour. I am not this OCD about ANYTHING else. I'm slightly ashamed. I went as far as to use Q-Tips to clean in between the keys. Q-Tips for Pete's sake. THOSE ARE FOR EARS. Someone might need to send help. I might do the dishes next or something productive like that.
But I'll be damned if my computer doesn't look effing amazing.
Side bar - When I ordered my dreamy iBook G4 circa February 2005 and I upgraded the hard drive space to 60 GB my brother quite vehemently assured me there was no way humanly possible that I would EVER necessitate such an impossibly gigantic hard drive. Moving on.
The day progressed thusly: I woke up to the gigantic mess that is my apartment, as I have yet to clean it. I hate cleaning. I am procrastinating the cleaning. It's kind of gross outside and I'm feeling a little sick. I can't do outdoorsy mountain things so I will do something geeky. I will download some new music. Let's see how full I can pack this computer.
Now, I've had this fine machine for a number of years and I love it. I have been an Apple nerd since before it was cool and hip to be an Apple nerd. I realize it's pretentious to say that and no one will probably believe me, but you can ask my parents. I annoyed the hell out of them for a Mac long before I was lucky enough to get one. I had to accidentally (oops) kill my PC laptop to get this one. It's been a good companion. We've been through a lot together. It's only had to go to the repair shop once because someone accidentally threw a full drink on it in the dorms. That person very nearly lost his life. He's lucky he's a very large man and that I'm a relatively small and weak girl. Relatively.
Anyway, after many years of use, the white case iBooks get, well, a little gnarly. Like, really gnarly. I tried to help by covering mine in sweet stickers which shows that I am an independent thinker and that I like really sweet bands while simultaneously hiding the really big scratches on the lid. There is very little you can do, however, about the gnar level of the keyboard. It gets gross. Just gross. Which I have usually been able to keep under tabs in the past with a low-level use of elbow grease.
It seems, though, that conditions here in the mountains have made for a far nastier computer dirtiness level than anywhere else I've had this thing. It's never been like this. I think the dirt is part cement. It might cause cancer. Or cure it. That would be my luck, now that it's all cleaned off my keyboard. Anyway, I started with my usual method, the iKlear Apple Polish product. Didn't touch whatever kind of mutant dirt was all over the keys. I tried Windex on cotton swabs. Nothing.
So then I moved on to rubbing alcohol. What just happened to the last hour of my life? Seriously. An hour. I am not this OCD about ANYTHING else. I'm slightly ashamed. I went as far as to use Q-Tips to clean in between the keys. Q-Tips for Pete's sake. THOSE ARE FOR EARS. Someone might need to send help. I might do the dishes next or something productive like that.
But I'll be damned if my computer doesn't look effing amazing.
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